Written by Colin Johnson, Author + Illustrator of Challenge to Change's newest book release, Terry's Goblin
Terry's Goblin by Colin Johnson will be released on October 1st!
"I had to learn that the Goblin isn’t a flaw in myself, but that the Goblin is part of myself.” ~ Colin Johnson
The stories I write are inspired by my own life experience. I think art and writing are best when taken from real life and real emotions. When I was younger, I struggled with ADHD symptoms. I didn’t understand why my classmates and many of the adults in my life treated me like a burden. Being picked on by other kids was one thing, but seeing adults in my life give an exasperated sigh, or reflexively correct me before I had even opened my mouth was probably the worst of it. I grew up thinking there was something inherently wrong with me. Looking back, I can see how that hurt me a lot.
I felt like I was constantly at odds with this other version of myself, a metaphorical "Goblin". I felt like wherever I went, whatever I was doing, it was only a matter of time before people saw the Goblin. With every missed deadline, failed objective, and awkward interaction, I felt like the goblin was more and more of what those around me were seeing. In spite of every success, achievement, or accolade, the Goblin was all that mattered.
He was an oblivious idiot at best and a deliberate saboteur at worst. Not only was I struggling to maintain focus on tasks, but I was fighting a losing battle against the perception that the Goblin was all of me.
One of Colin's illustrations from Terry's Goblin
I tried everything, thinking there must be a simple cure for the Goblin problem. I hoped that the right words or speech could rid me of my Goblin passenger, allowing me to be like everyone else around me. I tried faking it, ignoring it, and compensating for it, but nothing worked. Each attempt only led to disappointment and reinforced the Goblin image when my facade crumbled.
Eventually what I learned (and what I am still learning) is to accept it. I am myself and that is all I need to be. Fighting against the Goblin was a bit like fighting against having a big toe or a nose. I had to learn that the Goblin isn’t a flaw in myself, but that the Goblin is part of myself.
For instance, I have a tendency to lose track of time. Sometimes I fail at meeting goals or deadlines. I might be staring at you and not hear a single word you said. But by accepting my shortcomings and acknowledging when I need support, I've learned that I can turn my perceived flaws into strengths.
One of Colin's illustrations from Terry's Goblin
Tips for Parents
I put a lot of thoughts into this blog post but, I think the main idea is that there is no magic potion for kids or parents to deal with having a Goblin. For parents, I would say the best way to help their child with ADHD would be to model acceptance for them.
People with ADHD are going to struggle, they’re going to fail, and they’re going to be singled out. People in their lives can support them by offering compassion, modeling acceptance and forgiveness, and working together to find solutions to problems.
Ask for support from them when you need it, forgive them for making mistakes, and work with them to find solutions.
One of Colin's illustrations from Terry's Goblin
As a parent of a wild child, I struggle with modeling this behavior as well, and when I do, I ask my kids for forgiveness and understanding. It isn’t a one-way street and their feelings are valid.
Remember, they are perfect just the way they are. This can be a difficult concept to grasp, especially when they are struggling in school or other areas. However, during these challenging times, they look to you for guidance on how to behave. If you respond with anger, regret, or disdain, they will learn to treat themselves in the same way in the future.
~ Colin
P.S. Terry's Goblin releases on October 1st, but you can pre-order your copy today!
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